Proper Sympathy Card Etiquette

Celebrating a festive occasion such as a birthday, new baby or graduation is relatively easy. However, expressing your condolences in a bereavement message can sometimes be tough since people deal with loss in different ways. Here are some guidelines about sympathy card etiquette to make it easier for you when sending a sympathy card and in expressing your feelings.

General Guidelines for sending Sympathy Cards:

• Send your sympathy card as soon as you can after hearing about the death. Keeping an assortment box of elegant sympathy cards on hand will alleviate having to run to the store when the occasion suddenly presents itself.
• If you knew the deceased but not their family, the card should be sent to the deceased’s closest relative (usually the widow/widower or the eldest child). If you did not know the deceased but care to acknowledge a grieving friend or family member, the card should be addressed specifically to that person.
• Include your last name when signing the card even if you know someone well, especially if you have a common first name.
• Be sure you include your return address on the outside of the envelope so that the recipient can send a thank you.
• Keep your message relatively short.

Any of the following phrases or combinations thereof are appropriate in expressing your sentiments on sympathy cards:

• My/Our deepest sympathy to you and your family
• With deepest sympathy during this time of sorrow
• My/Our thoughts and prayers are with you during this difficult time
• My/Our heartfelt condolences on the loss of your mother/husband/friend
• I/We am/are sorry for your loss
• Name of deceased will always be in our/my hearts/heart
• In loving memory of Name of deceased
• Thinking of you during this time of sorrow

By following these simple guidelines for sympathy card etiquette, you can help the bereaved through their grieving process.